Save Yourself a Subpoena

by NanceGreggs


After reading about US prosecutors having withdrawn a subpoena seeking the identities of thousands of people who bought used books through Amazon.com, I just thought I’d send a message to Agent Mike and the gang.

Hey, if you want to know what books I’m reading, what TV shows I’m watching, where I get my news info, and where I go on the internet, feel free to call and ask.

It’s not that I think you have any right to the information. But if this is what you’re wasting your time and the taxpayers’ money on, maybe I can save you a couple of bucks and free up your afternoons.

You see, I, as the saying goes, have nothing to hide – and allow me to be specific.

I’m FOR impeachment, criminal investigations into this corrupt administration, the immediate end of the Iraq occupation, a full accounting of the billions of dollars that have allegedly been spent on this bogus War on Terror, along with full disclosure of every communication, email, letter, and minutes of meetings ever written, sent and/or received by the hoodlums who are currently running my government. And I WANT that information with respect to every issue from the intelligence that was ignored pre-9/11, to the fabrication of psuedo-facts that led up to Shock ‘n Awe, to the firing of US attorneys.

And let me add that phrases like executive privilege and redacted for reasons of national security mean the same thing to me they mean to most citizens: SOMEBODY’S LYING – BIG TIME.

My TV viewing habits are not difficult to discern – but again, I’m more than happy to let you in on them; no need to sit outside my house in the cold and spy (although there is an open-all-night coffee shop around the corner, in case your investigation yields trivia too boring to keep you awake).

You won’t catch me watching FOX-News (because I have an IQ higher than a house plant), or CNN (because I really don’t care what Paris or Britney are doing today), or any other MSM news outlets (because life is too short to waste ingesting mind-numbing pablum spooned-up by corporate shills).

I get my news on the internet, sourced from actual journalists, domestic and international, who have an odd predilection for facts. I also watch The Daily Show and the Colbert Report, because after a day of reading about what this administration is doing to my country, as well as others, I really need a dose of laughter with my news at the end of the day.

My internet travels also contain visits to sites that discuss what you spooks like to refer to as conspiracy theories – and I know that’s an irritating craw in your collective throats of late. Here’s an idea: Persuade the government you work for to TELL THE GOD-DAMNDED TRUTH about what happened on 9-11, in the lead-up to the Iraq invasion, or about the undeniable ties between the profits of Halliburton, the Carlyle Group, Big Oil and Big Pharma and those in power and maybe – just maybe – people will stop gathering together on-line to speculate about the truth in the face of one cover-up after another.

As for the reading habits of people like myself, no need to subpoena Amazon for their records. Get on a f*ckin’ bus or subway and look at what people are reading on their commute to-and-from work. And guess what? I doubt you’ll see any noses buried in the worthless crap that spews from the pens of the Swiftboat Veterans or Bill O’Reilly – and Good God, people, doesn’t that TELL YOU ANYTHING?

Honestly, you won’t find anyone missing their bus-stop because they’re engrossed in Ann Coulter’s latest (and a word to the wise: If you’re really interested in reading her crap and think the 99-cent on-line offers aren’t enticing enough, you can always pick up a copy of whatever at one of the dollar stores where these tomes are dumped by the carton-load after being purchased by some right-wing group in order to get the recorded sales numbers up into Best Seller territory.)

As you can plainly see (or would see, if you only had your heads completely out of your asses) – in spite of my reading habits – I’m not that anti-American subversive you should be focused on.

I’m not a Republican politician with an industrial-strength paper-shredder, plus an IT guy on retainer to ensure that when I hit that select all - delete configuration on my computer, all of the embarrassing and/or incriminating email actually does irretrievably disappear.

I’m not an elected-to-office GOPer with so many skeletons in my closet, I don’t have room for a mothball - and I’m not an in-the-mothball-bereft closet pedophile texting sexual invitations to under-aged kids.

I’m not a big-mouthed “Christian pastor” with an ability to deliver votes to the right party in exchange for that party not defining my tax-exempt status too narrowly.

I am not a torture-loving, warmongering idiot with a penchant for undermining the Constitution. I am not in danger of being arrested for war crimes if I travel internationally. I am not a recipient of a dime from Jack Abramoff, Duke Cunningham and Dusty Foggo have never been to my house for cocktails, and Jeff Gannon never got a fake press ID from me or anyone I know.

Not for nuthin’, guys, but if you really want to know who the criminals in this country are – the ones who’d sell this entire nation down the river for a fat bank deposit into an offshore account, or, alternatively, a golfing trip to Scotland or some good seats at a basketball game – you’re not going to get anywhere issuing subpoenas to an on-line book seller.

You’d be much better off taking a good hard look at the people who don’t read (or can’t) – and we all know who they are, don’t we?

Anyway, if you need any further scintillating information about what citizens like myself are focused on these days, just give me a call - and in exchange, I promise to give you AN EARFUL (although it's stuff you probably won't want to hear). As for my phone number - well, if you're as on-the-job as you seem to think you are, you'll already have that information, won't you?

Waiting to hear from ya ...


Posted in full with author's permission.

Originally posted at democraticunderground.com: http://journals.democraticunderground.com/NanceGreggs/311